Hummer Gas Mileage Not Found

The mileage data you are looking for never existed, because Hummers essentially get no gas mileage. 10 MPG means that the typical Hummer burns petroleum faster than Saddam Hussein in Kuwait.

Please try the following:

  • If you drive a Hummer, sell it. Your penis will remain small whether or not you drive a half-baked knockoff of a military vehicle. Drive something that gets better gas mileage, like, say, a Kenworth.
  • If you reached this page because you're considering buying a Hummer, see the previous item.
  • If you're here just to see what mileage a Hummer really gets, it averages about 10-14 MPG. No, we're not kidding. You could take a Chevy Suburban and tow another car behind it and you'd STILL get better gas mileage.
  • It's quite possible that the Hummer was originally marketed as a joke. Then the designers realized folks were actually stupid enough to buy a vehicle that's too large for 99% of parking spots, rides like a pissed-off camel in an earthquake and has great features like a leaky sunroof, an air conditioner that doesn't work and other fun stuff.
  • If you actually drive off-road, we'll cut you some slack. Just remember that 10-14 MPG figure is for street driving, not off-road. So you'd better bring another car to carry spare gas.

Forget About The Hummer

May we recommend a Toyota Prius, instead?

This is a little internet marketing silliness by Conversation Marketing.